Fullmetal avengers
by RedRosa1
Summary: FMA/Avengers fusion, initially angsty will probably degenerate into crack fairly quickly (don't worry I'm good at crack). Ed is a weapon designer who suffered a nasty accident in Afghanistan, his brother Al suffered an even nastier accident in Afghanistan and is now a computer, Greed is big and green, Armstrong was recently defrosted, and Scar is an alien. more summary inside
1. Chapter 1

**OK i'm not sure why I felt the need to write this but for some reason I couldn't get the thought out of my head, and as a result I couldn't update seitreitei on strike, so I wrote this to get the gremlins out of my head and once it was written it seemed like a waste not to publish. If you want more I can write more. If you don't want more there will probably be more anyway, but only when the gremlins get particularly bad (i've decided plot gremlins is a far more accurate term than plot bunnies.)**

**Anyway this is basically an FMA/Avengers fusion starring Edward Elric as Tony Stark, Alphonse as Jarvis, and Winry as Pepper. Future chapters will likely include, Ling/Greed as the Hulk, Hughes as Coulson, Envy as Loki, and Armstrong as Steve. It will probably get increasingly cracky as it goes on. My work has a tendency to do that, but it's starting out angsty on the basis that all superheroes need an angstybackstoryTM in order to be proper super heroes.**

**BTW- I own nothing, thus I have no attachments to this world, thus I am enlightened, thus I am one with the universe, thus I am always right, thus no-one can argue with me, thus there is no point in taking me to court as I will undoubtedly win. (that my friends is logic.) **

**Chapter one- In a cave in Afghanistan**

Edward Elric was a disgrace. Everybody told him so. The newspapers told him so, his assistant Winry told him so, even his little brother Alphonse told him so, although Ed could always see the smile Al tried to hide when he was telling him off for yet another indiscretion. Edward Elric was a disgrace, he freely admitted it. He was a womaniser, a party boy, and a menace to polite society, and the last time someone called him short, his teeth had to be forcibly removed from their hat. Still, Edward decided, being a disgrace did not mean he deserved to be in this cave, with two limbs missing, and a bunch of terrorists pointing guns at him and forcing him to build bombs for him. Besides, even if he did deserve some kind of comeuppance for his actions, that was no reason for Alphonse to be dragged in here with him. On the other hand, if Alphonse hadn't been here he would probably be in even worse straits. It was proving to be almost impossible to build complex machinery with only one hand, especially given he couldn't even stand. With Alphonse to act as his hands, and help him with the plans, he at least stood a chance of escape. Edward would have been happy to rot in here forever if it meant Alphonse was safe at home. But Alphonse was here, which meant they had to escape. Two geniuses and a bunch of bomb parts, they had to be able to figure something out right?

"Hey Ed" Al murmured pensively, as they worked, "They've got a lot of Elric weaponry here you know?"

"Yeah. I'm kinda wondering how they got their hands on it. Most of this stuff we only sell to the American military." Ed responded absently.

"I've been thinking a lot lately Ed. Are you sure we're doing the right thing? Our weapons hurt a lot of people. A lot, and I'm not sure we're really keeping our country safe."

"I'll admit it is worrying that terrorists have our weapons. They could hurt a lot of innocent people with these. We'll have to tighten up security when we get back, stop this kind of thing from happening." Ed declared. Al just looked troubled.

"It's not just that Ed. I agree, terrorists having our weapons is bad, but it's more than that. I spoke to this reporter a while before we left and she said some things that troubled me, so I've been doing some research. Do you know how many innocent civilians the American military kills every year?"

"No" Ed replied, surprised at the question.

"Well neither does the American government. No one knows for sure, and most of the estimates I've found are pretty high. Don't you find that disturbing."

"What's your point Al?" Ed didn't like where this conversation was headed. He didn't like the implications of what Al was saying, they skirted too close to the edge of things he didn't want to be true. Then again it was at least distracting him from another fact he really didn't want to be true. The only way the terrorists could have gotten these weapons was if there was a traitor in his company, high up in his company. In other words, someone they trusted. In some ways he was thankful that Al wasn't willing to drop the discussion they were having.

"My point is that if people are using the weapons we created to kill innocent civilians, doesn't that make us responsible. I read one story, the military bombed a wedding, then they bombed the people who went to dig survivors out of the wreckage, then they bombed the memorial service for the victims. They used Elric weapons to do it. We killed those people Ed, we didn't pull the trigger but we killed them."

"No, if we hadn't made the weapons someone else would. Would the brand name on the bomb have made any difference to those peoples deaths? No it wouldn't." Ed was lying, to himself and Al and he wished he could believe the lie.

"You're wrong Ed and you know it. We're good at making weapons, we're the best. Other people might make them if we didn't, but they wouldn't be the same, they wouldn't be as effective." Al's voice dropped to a whisper. "More people die when they use our weapons Ed. You know it's true."

Ed's shoulders slumped in defeat. "So what do you want to do?" He said tiredly.

"We should stop making weapons. We should make things to help people instead of killing them. New power sources, prosthetic limbs, anything, just no more weapons. Please brother." Ed looked away.

"Well this discussion will be a moot point unless we can get out of here, so we should probably get back to work."

Days later as he held his dying brother in his arms he swore that he would make his brother's wish a reality. There would be no more Elric weapons to kill the innocents of the world. Not ever. As he activated the suit to destroy the terrorist that had shot his baby brother he swore that he wouldn't let Al's death be in vain.

Weeks after that, after he had been found wandering in the desert with nothing but his clothes and a leg made of recycled bomb parts, after he'd come home to an empty house with no kind little brother waiting for him, after he'd buried an empty coffin, and refused to cry for the tabloids, he'd finally entered his brothers personal lab and discovered his brother's top secret project. Then he'd cried. His brother wasn't dead, not really. His brother was a genius, and he had saved his soul to a hard drive. Now all Ed had to do was bind it to a body. Once Ed had managed to upload the results of Al's experiments in human consciousness transferal, into the computer systems of his house, he knew his brother had been successful. Had managed to successfully transfer a copy of his own consciousness into a computer program. Of course this version of Al had no memory of the cave in Afghanistan, but aside from that it was totally up to date. He cried, because while his brother was discorporated, was trapped in the computers, couldn't eat, or touch or sleep, at least he was alive. Ed was a genius, he would find a way to return Al's body. Until then he and Al would keep moving forward. Trying to fix the wrongs they had done to the world, trying to fix each other.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN- yes i know its been ages, I got distracted, sorry about that. I also plan to update seiteitei on strike within the week.**

**BTW I own nothing, noting exists, relity is one electron existing in all places semi simultaneously**

**Chapter 2- On the run in South America**

Ling was tired, and lost, and very very hungry. In fact he was pretty sure he was dying of hunger. Oh what an ignominious end for a prince of Xing to face. Left to starve in the gutter by hordes of unfeeling strangers, after being forced to flee from his home. Oh the tragedy of it.

"If you don't pull yourself together and get us something to eat Kid, I'm going to take over and neither of us wants to do that in the middle of a crowded street full of people do we?"

Groaning Ling dragged himself back up off the pavement. Greed was right he probably should pull himself together, even if threatening to blow their cover was a bit of an extreme reaction.

"Ok ok, I'm up." Now he had to find some food. He could try stealing some, but the last year or so on the run had proved beyond a doubt that he was much better at begging than stealing. The trouble was that in poverty stricken third world countries the begging competition was pretty fierce. Maybe he should get a job?

"Like you've got any marketable skills, kid. You've spent most of your life being a rich idiot with no day job, you've got no employment history, no saleable skills, and you don't even speak the language right." Ling sighed, it was true, if not entirely his fault. No-one expected princes to be useful, even if the country did have a lot of them, honestly if his dad hadn't gone nuts and promised to make whoever could get him the supersoldier serum heir then he could have lived his life quite happily with no useful skills. As it was though, he had a problem.

"Well what's your suggestion?" His alter ego was silent.

In the end his long standing martial arts hobby managed to land him a job as a security guard for a factory, the pay wasn't particularly good, and he suspected the whole place was owned by the mob, but the owner didn't ask questions, and he could just about afford somewhere to stay and enough food to get by. Late at night he allowed his thoughts to drift, to just how he'd wound up in this mess.

It all started with his father the emperor of course. He had decided that possessing the supersoldier serum would make their country invincible, and in the spirit of free enterprise had promised that whichever of his children could provide it would be made heir to the kingdom of Xing, thereby igniting years of low level sibling rivalry into an all-out war that Mei had compared to an episode of Game of Thrones. Anyway the chance to become emperor was a tempting offer, and of course, Ling had gone for it. He was a scientist, even rich layabouts had to study something in college if they wanted to hang out with hot girls and go to parties, and he figured his scientific background would give him an edge over the competition. He'd recruited lots of other bright, and capable scientists, set up a lab, and settled in for some serious research, so far so good. Unfortunately there had been a bit of an accident, resulting in an invincible giant green alter ego that preferred to go by the name of Greed, and a certain amount of destruction and devastation to the surrounding area. Personally Ling considered the experiment a failure, unfortunately a lot of his relatives disagreed, having decided that an invincible green monster was close enough to a supersoldier to satisfy the emperor.

The upshot of all of this was that Ling was now on the run from hordes of family members who wanted to dissect him, or failing that just remove him from the equation, having to peddle his martial arts skills as an under the table security guard for a business that was almost certainly a front for organised crime, not getting nearly as many bowls of noodles as he wanted for dinner, he hadn't seen his girlfriend/bodyguard since the accident and as far as he was concerned it was _all greed's fault, _well except for the bit where he'd walked into that lab while the experiment was running, that was his own fault. Try as he might though he couldn't quite hate Greed, after all if you can't rely on your own alter ego who can you rely on. It might be Greed's fault they were in this mess but it was also largely thanks to him that they had got this far, besides, he was good company, they had a lot in common. Anyway things were actually kind of looking up, and God how low had his standards fallen, but they now had a job, a flat and food. If he could just work out a way to get his relatives off their backs, and maybe get in touch with his girlfriend Lan-Fan, they'd be golden.

Of course that was the point where it all went wrong again. Mercenary soldiers hired by his sister Mei showed up at his workplace, Greed took over to get rid of them, and then they had to go on the run again. He had no idea how they'd tracked him, with his luck they were tracing the radioactivity in his blood or something. He wasn't sure why he headed for the USA, except that, last he heard, Lan Fan was there working bodyguard detail for some rich idiot named Edward Elric. Maybe he could mooch off her for a bit, rich bosses equalled big tips right? At any rate, he had nowhere better to go, and it would have to be easier begging lunch off people in a country where most people had plenty to eat. First things first though, he had to get out of the jungle, and find some trousers. Not necessarily in that order.


End file.
